Monthly Archives: September 2013

Keeping the Faith!

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This planet is going through so much transformation right now, with all the darkness getting flushed to the surface within us and all around us. It would be so easy to just buy into all the fear and believe that all the darkness is the Truth or here to stay. It takes great strength to believe in the light, when all around us might appear dark, but that is the time that our strength and faith is needed the most.

Light is pouring into us and the planet, which can feel unsettling. I used to have very deep depressions, even contemplating suicide at times. It is amazing to me to look back and realize that I don’t go to that place anymore. I still have down days and I have had more stress, betrayal, abandonment, injuries, a tumor surgery, a car accident, some horrible work situations, 3 main moves, a long frustrating law suit, attacks, estrangement from my son (my best friend), …you name it, since Oct. 1999 when my Mom died, the last of my birth family, than in my life up until then. And I’ve presently been on the road for 11 months, now staying in my 25th place. And yes, I have days I feel afraid, days that tears come, like today, days of frustration….but I don’t travel to that dark place anymore because I have filled myself up with so much light.

I have learned that emotions just come and go, thoughts come and go, that I am always connected to source, that good always shines through, that there is always a “plan”, and that in the end, I always end up stronger than before. Sometimes I want to cry “Uncle”, and yet, after all I’ve been through, there remains a curiosity, as I wonder what is next? What solution is going to arise? And something always comes.

So, please, cry when you need to, scream if you have to, and when you are done, fall into your heart and feel that connection with God and your soul, and know all will be well, all is well…and let the light shine!

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Coming Out of the Dark…

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This is so powerful and beautiful. I spent much of my life in that darkness when the world seemed so far from the spiritual guidance I had received as a child. Now I know the truth that the light is always there, God is always there and I see the light no matter what is going on within me or my world.

The Roofless Church

Somewhere in time there is a part of me that I visit frequently.  He is in a dark room and he feels alone.  He is living a lie.  He believes that he is separate from God and from everything else in life–the consummate individual.  Even though he knows that he can get up and walk out of that room anytime he wants to, he refuses.  He refuses, because he knows that outside of that room responsibility awaits.  If he walks out of that room he has to admit that he got himself into his situation.  He has to own his pain.  If he walks out of that room he has to admit how forsaken he feels.  He has to admit how naive he is. Outside of that room is a history of being misunderstood, misjudged, and misaligned with the world.  If he walks out that door he will experience a…

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The movie “The Way”, pilgrimages and journeys!

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I recently watched the movie “The Way” and loved it. I had read an article quite awhile ago interviewing Emilio Estevez, the writer, director and co-star in the movie, about the process and working with his Dad, Martin Sheen, the star of the movie. So I was already intrigued. I had also read a book by Shirley Maclaine about her journey on the El Camino de Santiago, and was inspired and fascinated by this journey. The movie focuses on Tom, played by Martin Sheen, as the stoic and traditional father, who finds out his lost son has been found dead, dying just as he had started this pilgrimage. Tom decides to journey the El Camino and spread his son’s ashes along the way. It is a rare emotional decision for him, and his impulsive decision brings him much more than he had envisioned when he started on the way. It is a movie of grief and loss, as well as discovery, friendship and transformation. It is beautiful in it’s unfolding as well as in the luscious scenery.

As I do with most movies, I looked at each character and inquired what I held in common with them and where we were different. Unlike the main character, I would not have been tight lipped like he was, as I am known for my open sharing, but I could relate to his anger, grief and unknowing as he wondered about his son’s whereabouts, felt the pain of their estrangement, and then his anger, grief and loss when his son was found dead. In truth, I am much more like his impetuous, leaping, restless son, Daniel; but you see, I, too, have lost a son, not to death, but to estrangement.Although, like Daniel, I am the one that has leaped into adventure throughout my life and recently on a now 11 month journey of faith.

I looked at the kind and talkative character, Joost, and saw my golden retriever self who assumes that everyone wants to talk to me, know me, be engaged. I looked at the angry, defensive, wounded character, Sara, and saw the me that I have been healing along this journey, as I attempt to make sense of the loss of past relationships and dreams. I looked at the character of Jack, the verbose writer, living out a life much smaller than he had dreamed of, and see how much I have limited myself for way too long.

In watching this movie I realized that I, too, have been on a pilgrimage, not spreading physical ashes of a cremated son, but certainly spreading metaphoric ashes of my past and the relationships in it, as I have revisited many of the towns and places where I have lived, traveled to, or hiked. It was that giving up hope and attachment to my past relationships that was the last step for me, letting go of those last ashes in the bottom of the bag, knowing that this is it, the end…and letting them go in the wind.

It is fitting that I am ending this journey in San Diego, CA. as this is where I spent so much time as a child and adult, vacationing with my family, and then later with my Mom and/or my son. And this is where I spread my Mother’s ashes in Nov. 1999, on my way back to Seattle, where I was living with my son, moving there in Oct. 1998 after leaving Colorado. And here I am finishing this journey in San Diego now, before heading home to Colorado, going full circle. Now, like Tom in the movie, I need to stand next to the ocean, reach down in my bag, and gather the last vestiges of my past relationships and life; gather my long held dreams of the future; and finally and firmly throw these ashes to the wind and the water, letting go and saying goodbye to what was, honoring it and making room for what will take it’s place.

I am grateful for the sweet memories I have of my life up until now. I am grateful for the experience of being a single Mom and managing to stay loving and attentive no matter what challenges I faced. I am grateful for the friends and support I’ve had along this pilgrimage. And now it is time for me to leave this funeral pyre and begin my new adventure, alone, yes, but now with room to let others into my heart, my restored and healed heart. Now it is time for me to go home and settle into my new launching pad for future adventures.

So I encourage you to watch “The Way” and enjoy your journey, wherever it takes you. Remember life is to be lived, not something you got stuck in, so live it with faith and enjoy it along the way.

Love, Katelon

A Treasure Find

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Love this little movie!

Dolly Mahtani

This was a true gift to me. A friend of mine emailed this to me and I was grateful that I had someone who cared about me, who thinks about me enough to share something as beautiful as this short film with me.
I’d like to pay it forward and share it with you in the hopes that you watch it and it brings a Smile to your face =]

PS – I’d like to give you a challenge if i may.

Compliment one person today.

It could be anyone and in any way. But be honest with your words. And speak from your heart. Let someone know you love them, appreciate them, respect them and admire them. There’s no such thing as too much.

I love you.
I appreciate you.
I respect you.
I admire you.

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Prayer for Oneness of Our Human Family

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Beautiful and inspiring photos, powerful message!

Otrazhenie

“To all people, religious and nonbelieving, I make this appeal. Always embrace the common humanity that lies at the heart of us all. Always affirm the oneness of our human family…. Let not your differences from the views of others come in the way of the wish for their peace, happiness, and well-being.”

Dalai Lama

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From Prayer for Oneness

Few facts have become more evident in our lifetime than the fact that we live in a pluralistic world and society. With the rapid increase in the transmission of information and the ability to travel on a worldwide scale has also come an increasing awareness that both our world and society contain a multitude of diverse and conflicting viewpoints on many different issues. Nowhere is this pluralism more evident than in the realm of religion. What should our attitude be toward other religions?

In spite of the differences, all major religions foster a…

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Peace, what are you giving and receiving?

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Time for an update and repost of this article I wrote several years ago, originally around a winter solstice time. Sadly, it is still appropriate.

As you read this, the US is still mired in war in the Middle East and now considering another one, and the question still remains for me, Peace? What are you giving and receiving? It has long been a belief, and a point of inquiry of mine, that what goes on within us is a microcosm of the greater reality reflected out into the world. And so, along with activism, I continue to look within to discover, embrace and heal those places within myself that are at war. It is my intention, inside and out, to do what I can to embody, give and receive peace in the world. In the ancient text, The Essence Gospel of Peace, it states “ Peace is the key to all knowledge, all mystery, all life.”

25 years ago I was living in a small Northern California coastal town. My neighborhood reminded me of the powerful novel SOMETIMES A GREAT NOTION, by Ken Kesey. As I’d take my daily walks through the fogged in neighborhood, I ‘d pass sign after sign impaled in the yards stating, “We support the timber industry”. The small communities lining the coast embodied the timber/environmental clash so vividly described in that novel.

Months before, I had been asked to be interviewed on a local women’s radio show. The topic I chose was “Inner Healing and how it relates to Global Healing”. At the time, I was working as a massage therapist in a chiropractor’s office. One of my clients was a young man who had moved out from the south to make peace buttons for a local company. Although his job and his political activism spoke of peace, the extreme tension I felt in his body spoke of an ongoing inner war. I began to observe this dichotomy in myself and other clients, along with the already divided community. The day the US declared war on Iraq ended up being the day of my interview.

As war broke out in that country, war broke out in my town as the local mayor and city council declared the town a draft free zone. Opponents stormed the town hall, an enormous American flag was erected upon the approach to town, and all the yard signs were replaced with new ones stating “We support America”…and…. we’re on the air, welcome Katelon to discuss “Inner Healing and how it relates to Global Healing.”

I felt like I was in the twilight zone and all the mayhem further underscored this study of mine. There I was witnessing war in the body of this young man, opposing views and near riots in our town hall, SOMETIMES A GREAT NOTION in my neighborhood and bombs dropping across the seas as a TV reporter stood next to a board drawing little x’s and o’s like a football play to explain the loss of life many countries away.

Over the years I have continued to explore this theme as I work to release old limiting patterns of lack, illnesses, and aloneness in myself. Sometimes I am able to love what is here, or what I perceive to be lacking, embrace the lessons and provide the gift of peace to myself, as I open the space for healing to happen. Other times I am in the ring, working on my left hook, ready to punch out the offending lack of fruition, career struggle or another Saturday night spent alone. A few years ago this occasional fighting position was literally put in my face as I took a detour to work. I ended up driving past a 7th grade fistfight in the middle of the road. Because I haven’t seen a fist fight since my 7th grade year, I was left to ponder again where am I at war in my own being, what am I fighting? Peace? What am I giving and receiving? As I examine this wrestling with my psyche I am seeing it on the outside again, too, as my neighbors, fellow countrymen/women and world members draw the lines and continue wars.

One of the therapies I do is called, Spiritual Response Therapy (SRT). In this therapy, I work with a person’s high self to research and clear negative programs, conditioning, beliefs, etc. that are limiting the person and restricting the flow of good through their bodies, relationships and lives. This work is done using a pendulum, dowsing various charts and connecting with the person’s high self to research the soul’s records. Whatever needs to be cleared is then identified and with the assistance of the high self and spirit, it is cleared. The limiting energies are then replaced with positive ones, moving a person out of self-punishment and self-limitation. Relationships can be researched as well, clearing destructive patterns that can be limiting the relationship and the individuals. Christ referred to this high self as “the father within”. Hawaiian Huna refers to it as Aumakua or higher consciousness. What is seen so often in this work is how much people limit themselves through their thoughts and judgments brought forth from (depending upon your belief system), past lives, genetic codes, world energies, childhood experiences and the entire creative process in itself.

A few years ago, a man called to ask me to use SRT to “GET RID” of a woman he was in business with. He explained how this woman was attempting to take over his business and he wanted her gone. I explained that I’m not a hit man but that I could work with his high self and spirit to clear them and their relationship, allowing for a new resolution. The work succeeded and the woman called him, with positive news and wanted to get together to find a healthy resolution they could both be comfortable with. Instead of rejoicing in this turn of events, he was so attached to his anger that he chided me for not getting rid of her. I felt saddened by his response, yet I was led to look at what I was just wanting to get rid of in my life, rather than be willing to negotiate with, forgive, and create a space for something new to appear? I had to look at where was I limiting myself? I inquired again, “Peace? What am I giving and receiving?”

I watch in childlike awe each year as the days get shorter and shorter and darkness descends, leaving sunshine, that I so love, a memory. And yet, I attune to the surrender of the trees as they gently release their leaves, plants die and seeds are deposited deep in the soil to wait and rest until the light comes again. Most of the world religions celebrate this return of the light. I think of Mary, in the Christian tradition, as she gestated a child within, holding that immaculate concept for him as she faced many outer challenges. Certainly, she must have felt the urge to fight, the call to struggle or defend. I certainly did as I carried my son, and then went on to raise him alone through all the challenges we faced. Don’t we all, whether we are carrying a child, a dream or concept? And, yet, each of us can carry this immaculate concept for our children, our dreams and desires. Each of us can carry that seed of peace and continue to hold it in our hearts for the world and ourselves.

The days may be dark, the world may talk of war and torture and try to keep us focused on fear and our desires/dreams/challenges may threaten to pull us into an inner or outer war and yet there are methods and therapies that we can use to release this inner negativity and replace it with harmony. I do believe that we have the power within us to return to love, just as yearly the days grow longer and the light returns. I do feel that each step we take toward negotiation, dialogue, healing and bridge building within ourselves, our families, our communities, does reach out and effect global change. So, I encourage you to ask yourselves, “Peace? What are you giving and receiving?”